People were already carrying a level of residual fatigue from the Covid-19 crisis before last month's floods created such a devastating impact, says clinical psychology lecturer Kirsty Ross. Photo: RNZ / Cole Eastham-Farrelly
By Kirsty Ross*
Opinion - In Aotearoa New Zealand, water is often associated with fun and outdoor activities such as swimming, fishing, water-based leisure activities - be it in the sea, rivers or lakes. It is also associated with positive things such as cleansing, hydration and something that is refreshing on hot days.
What we have seen over the past few weeks in Tāmaki Makaurau Auckland is the other side of water.
Fast-moving, unstoppable, destructive and leaving behind so much heartache and a massive clean-up for those people and communities affected.
The water in floods isn't nice and clear and clean; it is full of dirt, debris, sometimes sewage, and basically anything the body of water collects in its path. It contaminates whatever it has flooded, meaning some people have lost precious possessions and their houses.
Some have also lost a sense of security and a sense of optimism that 2023 was going to be the start of better times after the impact of Covid-19. People were already recovering from that crisis and carrying a level of residual fatigue before the floods created such a devastating impact.
What has been left is a sense of both awe at the power of water and Mother Nature, and fear about the uncontrollable character of natural disasters.
There is also fear of more such events in the future, along with the immediate anxiety of having to find a new car, house, clothes, bedding, toys for the kids and all the things that make somewhere feel like home.
People are having to be separated from their beloved animals as they are placed in emergency accommodation. Understandably, people are watching the skies and weather forecasts with apprehension and a sense of vigilance to try to ward off any possible future threat.
Rain is now associated with negative experiences and anxiety. Let us not forget that four people tragically lost their lives to the water and those families are in mourning for their loved ones.
There are certainly lessons to be learned, it would seem, from how these events can be managed and how people can be given as much time as possible to prevent as much damage as possible. But no one can stop a storm.
It is crucial we do not have a sense of hopelessness in the midst of the challenge of the clean-up after these floods.
What is helpful is to focus on what is within your control. For example, keeping updated with weather forecasts (but not being overly obsessed with them), making sure that your insurance is updated, knowing how to make sandbags, where to source materials you might need to secure your house if needed, having precious documents, photos and items secured in waterproof bags on shelves high in your house, and having a place where you can go if you need to leave your house quickly, with some bags packed with clothes, medication and essential items.
Let us also focus on the heroes and the good we see when events like this happen.
What we have already seen is communities banding together, helping one another, dealing with this as a group. That is psychologically so beneficial - no one really understands what the floods were like more than those who went through it.
Feeling part of a collective with those who 'get it' leaves people feeling less isolated and alone.
However, people are still being affected differently and have suffered different degrees of loss, so also offloading to those who are 'fresh' to the situation and not managing their own distress and challenges can be helpful too.
Parents, remember that you need to care for yourselves in order to be able to provide the calm, reassuring support that your young people need. They are more likely to be ok if you are ok.
Focus on trying to eat well, sleep as well as you can, get outside and move your body, and stay connected to people you care about. Try to reinstate some routines and structure, while being flexible to roll with changed circumstances.
It is certainly understandable to feel angry, sad, worried and a sense of this not being fair - all incredibly valid emotions.
You don't have to sit with these feelings on your own. I encourage anyone who is struggling to reach out and let someone know if they need support, or to make use of the helplines available for advice or just a listening ear.
We know from previous disasters in New Zealand that those who have been affected sometimes feel forgotten as time goes on.
There is already talk of how long the clean-up will take in Tāmaki Makaurau and it is likely to be months, if not years.
As people affected are continuing to manage their daily lives, national support can drop off as another story takes centre stage on the news.
So it is important as a nation that we remember that this disaster has not stopped just because the storm moved away. People are living in difficult situations, facing long roads of financial, physical and emotional recovery, all while watching the skies nervously when it is looking like heavy rain may fall.
What we need to do is continue to reach out, check in and offer support to our fellow Kiwis in Auckland as they rebuild after a difficult start to what we all hoped (and continue to hope) would be a better year.
Where to get help
Need to talk? Free call or text 1737 any time for support from a trained counsellor.
Lifeline - 0800 543 354 (0800 LIFELINE) or free text 4357 (HELP).
Youthline - 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz or online chat.
Samaritans - 0800 726 666
Suicide Crisis Helpline - 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO).
Healthline - 0800 611 116
Depression Helpline - 0800 111 757 or free text 4202 (to talk to a trained counsellor about how you are feeling or to ask any questions).
thelowdown.co.nz - or email team@thelowdown.co.nz or free text 5626.
What's Up - 0800 942 8787 (for 5-18 year olds). Phone counselling is available every day of the week, 365 days of the year, 11am-11pm. Online chat is available from 11am-10:30pm, seven days a week, including all public holidays.
Alcohol and Drug Helpline - 0800 787 797 or online chat.
Are You OK - 0800 456 450 family violence helpline.
Gambling Helpline - 0800 654 655
Anxiety NZ - 0800 269 4389 (0800 ANXIETY).
Seniorline - 0800 725 463 A free information service for older people.
* Kirsty Ross is an associate professor and senior lecturer in clinical psychology at Massey University's School of Psychology.