Warning: This story contains details of abuse.
A survivor of abuse while in care says his time in jail was heaven compared with being in foster care.
File photo. Photo: 123rf.com
It was the honest view of 64-year old Mr EC in his evidence to the Royal Commission into Abuse in Care and its hearing on state foster care yesterday.
He spent time in family homes in Māngere and Clevedon from the age of about six. He experienced unspeakable violence and abuse.
''I got my thumbs bent right back. I have got arthritis now, they kill me. My fingers bent back. I just got the hidings from hell.''
These included severe head injuries that have affected his life ever since. ''I don't know if I am Arthur or Martha.''
He said a social worker would visit every fortnight and EC tried to talk to him about the severe beatings.
His caregiver use to make a lot of excuses for the marks on his body. ''He used to tell the welfare that I got into fights with his own children, got into accidents, falling off trees and all that, but all crap.''
EC told the inquiry of being caught and punished for climbing a tree to pinch some nectarines.
''I got caught by the caregiver and he gave me a hiding and put me into a dog hole where the dog shit and eel guts would go.''
Another time when he ran away from the home and was eventually caught, he was taken back and punished for it.
''The guy got a tommy-hook, put it on my leg and whacked it a couple of times and it wouldn't cut so he used it like a saw and cut my leg, so I wouldn't run.''
''One time I had my hand on the table and the caregiver walked up to me and he stabbed a butchers knife through my hand and I still got the scar today on my hand.''
''The whacks got that bad I could never cry again. I got use to being hit after a while," he said.
Apart from the violence at the Māngere family home he was also severely neglected.
''I use to be really sick sometimes and never go to the doctors. Never went to a doctor ever. I had lumps all over me, I had sores, I had bruises, sore bones and head problems but no one ever took me to a doctor.''
He said he only got a meal about two or three times a week.
He had to compete with the dog for food.
''If I did get a feed it was a race with the dog. I never ate on the table," the man said.
''In a little silver or plastic bowl under the table. First in, first served.
''Sometimes I would be chained up with the dog and we had to sleep together.''
He describes his life as a shit, always feeling like an outcast, both as a child and still does to this day.
''I don''t sleep. I have three hours of sleep every day of my life. I am on medication every single day of my life. I take 12 pills a day. From stress, anxiety, pain, everything. I take pain killers every day because my body is shot.''
After years in foster care, he from working on a farm to stealing and then joining a gang. After that it was on to prison.
''Seventeen years in prison, in and out, but while I didn't enjoy it, I did. I had friends, I had food and I was safe.''
He spent two year working in a wing of Mount Eden Prison full of murderers.
''Nothing bad happened to me when I was in that wing. I actually went on to enjoy prison life. I turned out to be the prisoners' best mate. They would look after me and no one would touch me because the murderers were my friends.
''Prison wasn't a nice place to be put but after what had happened to me during my life as a state ward, prison was actually heaven compared to what I had been through.''
He said there were a lot of people like him in prison who had been treated poorly in state care but had a better life in prison.''
Where to get help:
Need to Talk? Free call or text 1737 any time to speak to a trained counsellor, for any reason.
Lifeline: 0800 543 354 or text HELP to 4357
Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 / 0508 TAUTOKO (24/7). This is a service for people who may be thinking about suicide, or those who are concerned about family or friends.
Depression Helpline: 0800 111 757 (24/7) or text 4202
Samaritans: 0800 726 666 (24/7)
Youthline: 0800 376 633 (24/7) or free text 234 (8am-12am), or email talk@youthline.co.nz
What's Up: online chat (3pm-10pm) or 0800 WHATSUP / 0800 9428 787 helpline (12pm-10pm weekdays, 3pm-11pm weekends)
Asian Family Services: 0800 862 342 Monday to Friday 9am to 8pm or text 832 Monday to Friday 9am - 5pm. Languages spoken: Mandarin, Cantonese, Korean, Vietnamese, Thai, Japanese, Hindi, Gujarati, Marathi and English.
Rural Support Trust Helpline: 0800 787 254
Healthline: 0800 611 116
Rainbow Youth: (09) 376 4155
OUTLine: 0800 688 5463 (6pm-9pm)
Abuse survivors
For male survivors -
Road Forward Trust, Wellington, contact Richard 0211181043
Better Blokes Auckland, 099902553
The Canterbury Men's Centre, 03 3776747
The Male Room, Nelson 035480403
Male Survivors, Waikato 07 8584112
Male Survivors, Otago 0211064598
For female survivors -
Help Wellington, 048016655
Help, Auckland 09 623 1296.
For urgent help: Safe To Talk 0800044334.
If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.