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Having to navigate her way in a place where Te Ao Māori wasn't at the forefront of her every day life was difficult for New Zealand netball representative Tiana Metuarau.
Tiana Metuarau during the Southern Steel's win over the Tactix on Monday. Photo: Photosport
After moving from England to Aotearoa when she was just three years old, she was immersed in Māoritanga. But when she was nine, she was introduced into an entirely new world, Te Ao Pākehā.
"I think the turning point, or one of the most memorable points of my childhood, was when I went to a mainstream school and I had never been to a class where we weren't starting the morning off with a karakia, or where people would speak English," she said.
"I didn't know how to speak, read or write in English and I wasn't really confident with my English until maybe Year 12 or 13.... and there were parts where I kind of felt like I was almost losing touch with my Māori side."
For the Southern Steel shooter it was the beginning of developing a sense of purpose.
"When I think about that time especially, and how tough it was to transition from just always speaking Māori, thinking Māori, and reading Māori, to just full English, I don't think I'd change [that experience]."
"I think it builds a lot of resilience and courage and you kind of develop a sense of purpose in a way that you want to prove to everyone and your peers that you can do what they can do, if that makes sense."
The 20-year-old, of Cook Island, Tahitian and Māori descent, said her culture had been a major driving force behind what she does both on and off the court, which included going home to Rarotonga and giving back to the sport at grassroots level.
Margharet Matenga in 2019 between ANZ Premiership shooter Aliyah Dunn (left) and Tiana Metuarau - the daughter of former PIC and Silver Ferns' team-mate Waimarama Taumaunu. Photo: Supplied
"I just love going back home and seeing how passionate the kids are about netball, and they're incredible. They've got so much passion, and they're just happy kids, happy people and they've got some insane talent over there. It's a different experience to see kids who don't have a ton, don't have the resources and don't have that same access that the kids here in New Zealand [have]."
"Once you know that you're kind of impacting other people's lives, even though it's just chucking a ball around, it's really very wholesome and a really nice feeling. It's just a shame that they don't have that luxury that some of the kids here do, which is exactly why I've started different programmes to cater to those sorts of things."
One of those programmes is Te Ara Angitu, which translates as the pathway to success, aiming to bring out the best of up and coming Māori and Pasifika players without the financial and language barriers.
Metuarau said it was about creating a comfortable space for Māori and Pasifika students, while using netball as the vehicle and kaupapa Māori as the fuel to normalise te reo in mainstream sport.
Tiana Metaurau playing for Wellington East Girls College in 2016. Photo: Supplied/Masanori Udagawa
"The purpose of it is just to give them the same opportunity as any other mainstream school, or kids, because we're heavily involved with mainstream schools and I feel like there's a lot of work that we could do, and we could put in a lot more effort into interacting with kura."
"I've been playing ANZ [Premiership] for maybe five years and I've only interacted with a kura maybe twice, it's a bit sad... I think it's quite nice that Te Reo Māori is being normalized more now in netball or just sport in general, where we can drive the revitalization of our language, but my biggest thing was that I wanted them to get the same experiences."
Metuarau admits she knows many kids who couldn't go on sports trips because their families couldn't afford it.
"It's hard when most of our programmes are fully funded and things like that, but there are so many other alternative ways that kids can get scouted or seen by selectors and yet they may not have been able to go because they couldn't afford to go on rep tournaments or something like that, so it's exactly why I made it."
Nutrition is also important, she added.
"Growing up, I've had kids and friends who haven't had amazing food at school, so the nutrition part of things was really important that they got good quality food and again, good, decent gear, and not just second hand.... and so it's going really good."
Tiana Metuarau is a New Zealand Under 21 international of Māori, Cook Island and Tahitian descent. Photo: PHOTOSPORT
According to a University of Auckland study published last year, Māori and Pasifika netballers have helped create a distinct New Zealand style of play.
The research highlights the values Māori and Pasifika players and coaches bring to their teams, and argues it is having a positive effect on the competition.
Metuarau spent four seasons with the Central Pulse, the Wellington-based team which set the benchmark in embracing Māori culture and learning Te Reo Māori, and after winning their first title in 2019, she led the team haka performed for the public for the very first time.
She said she felt proud to be part of a team that wanted to celebrate and be connected to the Māori culture, but we should always be asking 'what's next'?
"It was quite nice to be in a space where Māori was really celebrated. It was nice to see that everything was progressing and it was really cool to see that they were slowly getting used to [learning the culture and the language] and breaking down those barriers where we felt really uncomfortable and shy, and that was a period where I was quite proud."
"And then when we did the haka that was very cool as well, but then it's kind of like, what's next? We've done a haka, how else do we keep showing that connection to the indigenous culture and things like that, so that's when I thought actually getting involved with them is probably the next step and one that needs to be continued."
The Pulse perform a Haka after their win ANZ Premiership Grand Final win on the 3rd of June 2019. Photo: PHOTOSPORT
For Metuarau, Te Ara Angitu is about providing assistance, eliminating barriers and creating more opportunities where Maori and Pasifika can be themselves.
"When I've seen how talented some of the Māori kids are and the Pacific Island kids, especially some of the ones that come from Rarotonga, like I've seen that real grassroots passion, it's quite almost sad to think that they might not be able to get the opportunity because they can't afford this or they haven't been involved in a program that might get them seen."
"There needs to be that focus where they are the priority in terms of creating that safe space for them, because sometimes it's pretty uncomfortable going into a camp and it's just you and like a couple of others. There's a little bit more I think that could be done, but I think everyone knows that, it's just about acting on it and whether or not they care enough to make it happen."