Photo: RNZ
Comfort eating, society tells us, is something to feel guilty about. Whether it’s secret trips to the drive-thru after a stressful day at work, or hiding a bag of chocolate buttons to eat when no one’s looking, we do it even though we’re told we shouldn’t.
I think it’s time to change the narrative. As a doctor working in mental health (and a cook), I believe eating your feelings can be a positive thing.
The trick is actively engaging with the feelings behind your food choices. Of course, this isn’t to diminish the seriousness of eating disorders (which can include binge-eating behaviours, sometimes incorrectly confused with comfort eating) as an increasing global illness. If you or a friend is suffering in this way, please seek medical help.
Food, flavour, and feeling are inseparable. Only recently has science begun to look at the mood-food relationship, focusing on the nutritional components that can boost your mood at a cellular level. Evidence points to a balanced wholefoods approach with minimal processing as the way to go.
Dr Alby Hailes Photo: Kathy Elliston
However, I would argue that it’s the emotions we attribute to our eating on a personal level that have a more pertinent impact on our mental health and diets.
Different foods can create unique feelings for the individual; you might associate a bowl of custard with happy childhood memories of your grandmother making it for you, but the mere thought of it might make someone else retch with disgust.
Our state of mind also impacts our diets and how our food tastes – stress can lead to convenient, often nutritionally depleted food choices, and an argument at the dining table will always put you off your dinner.
Becoming attuned to our emotional connections to food and flavour is key to developing a positive relationship with food, our minds, and bodies. This includes learning to comfort eat in a healthy way.
So why do we reach for certain comfort foods when we feel stressed or upset? Let’s take the example of ice cream, the stereotypical ‘my partner broke up with me and I’ll eat a whole tub’ comfort food. There are some biological hypotheses to explain ice cream’s comfort eating superpowers.
When we’re angry, stressed, or anxious, our body temperature can rise, and the cold temperature of ice cream may help to modulate this. Then there is the cooling sensation of ice cream in the mouth which connects to our somatosensory system to potentially relax us, and taste centres link to the orbitofrontal cortex which provides a rating of deliciousness and reward response (hence why it’s hard to stop at one mouthful).
Photo: Andres Molina for Unsplash
Milk is also a high source of tryptophan, an amino acid involved in the production of serotonin - our body’s natural mood booster. More importantly, the psychological effects of ice cream are undoubted. We often revert to our ‘inner child’ state when feeling threatened, so will lean into foods that have a sense of nostalgia and joy associated with childhood – and for many of us, ice cream is this food.
Similarly, when stressed we will reach for foods that have positive memories attached to them, and ice cream is often symbolic of happy times spent with whānau, dreamy summers, and holidays. In fact, ice cream is a perfectly appropriate comfort food and we should stop ganging up on it as the bad guy. The issue is often not WHAT we’re comfort eating (we all deserve some sweetness in our life as part of a balanced diet) but HOW we’re comfort eating.
I believe a healthy approach to comfort eating begins in the supermarket. If you know your comfort eating vices (personally, I can never stop at one row of the chocolate block), then a good place to start is by moderating your access to store-bought comfort foods at home. Aim for balance, not all-out restriction – it’s okay to have treats from time-to-time, but make sure you’re conscious of your eating choices.
Next, consider what your typical comfort foods are and what it is about them that you find comforting. You can then brainstorm healthier options that could bring you that same comforting effect. If it’s the warmth of a pie you yearn for, then perhaps a hot cup of tea or bowl of soup will have the same effect. If the creamy texture of ice cream is what calms you, then maybe a creamy bowl of unsweetened yoghurt could similarly soothe.
Alternatively, instead of having store-bought comfort foods in your home, force yourself to cook the food that brings you comfort (bake some brownies, or peel some spuds to make oven fries).
Cooking is an excellent form of mindfulness that gives you the time to tune into your emotions and destress through the kinetic and aromatic elements of the kitchen. It also means you’re less likely to eat the whole tub, so to speak, as the emotion intensity will reduce through the cooking process.
Lastly, consider why you are reaching for a particular comfort food. When heading desperately for the pantry after a bad day, ask yourself: What is my current emotional and cognitive state? Why am I feeling like this? What would actually be helpful to shift my mood?
Eating a bag of potato chips might still be your conclusion, but rather than it being an automatic stress response, this encourages some self-reflection first to better understand the feelings underneath.
It's time we stopped punishing ourselves for comfort eating, but rather learned how to comfort eat in a balanced, healthy, and helpful way. Happy eating starts with us.
Alby Hailes is a doctor and food writer. His new cookbook, Good Vibes, will be published in August.