This story contains details of sexual misconduct that may be distressing to some readers
A former assistant principal at an Auckland school told police he got a "thrill" out of the sexual messages he had with a student who had initially gone to him for help, while the 15-year-old was left feeling "indebted" to him.
Stuff can now reveal what former James Cook High School assistant principal Seelan Ramiah told police during a criminal investigation into his actions in February 2023.
"...This communication gave me this feeling of so much power and self-worth, self-esteem, it gave me, you know the belief that I was worth something in my life," Ramiah told police.
Earlier this year he appeared at the Manukau District Court and pleaded guilty to indecent communication with a young person under 16 and sexual conduct with a person under 16.
He declined to comment when Stuff visited his home on Thursday.
The new details come just days after Ramiah was fined and had his teacher's registration cancelled by the Teachers Disciplinary Tribunal for the same offending.
At the time of his offending, Ramiah was employed as a teacher at James Cook High School for two decades holding various pastoral or leadership positions.
It was a position of trust and responsibility.
Between 2018 and 2021, he was senior dean before he was appointed the assistant principal until May 2022, when his offending came to light.
At some point in early 2020, the student, then 15, began experiencing problems with her boyfriend and approached Ramiah for help as his capacity as dean.
The survivor said Ramiah took "immediate action", she began to trust him and contacted him whenever she had problems or needed advice.
According to the agreed summary of facts, she described herself as being "very insecure", but Ramiah made her feel comfortable.
"Because of how much he had done for her, she began to feel 'indebted' to him."
At some point during that first school term, Ramiah asked the student to contact him on Signal, an encrypted messaging application, and told her not to tell anyone.
The would often exchange messages during school hours, otherwise he would message her from 9pm until late in the evening. Ramiah would typically initiate the conversations and notwithstanding the hour, the messages were initially appropriate.
But the messages gradually became sexualised, with the assistant principal telling her what he would like to do with her sexually. He would also tell her he had an erection.
"He told her that the school principal had an apartment in the city, which he was allowed to use, and he invited her to join him there."
He repeatedly told her what he wanted to do with her and invited her to the apartment more than once. She did not accept the offers.
Ramiah later told police there was never any intention to carry through with what he had intended to do with her and it was "exciting talk" and "bravado".
She only wanted to talk to him about her problems, but he would sexualise the conversation whenever she spoke to him.
"She would therefore 'play along with him' sometimes, without knowing why."
At some point in late 2020, when the student was 15, Ramiah began sending sexualised pictures to her, including pictures of his penis, pictures of him in bed and in the bath.
Although the student sometimes said "no" to Ramiah, she would still send him nude pictures on other occasions.
The student, who was insecure about her weight, also was asked to send a picture of herself on the scale.
He also would indecently touch her during school hours in his office.
On one specific occasion in May 2021, when the student was still 15, Ramiah had nominated the student to be involved in an event.
He picked her up from her home and then took her home. Before he dropped her off, he told her to "come here", guided her head towards him and kissed her.
The students became uncomfortable and moved back from him.
When the student turned 16, things escalated and engineered opportunities to be alone with her.
He also gave her a sex toy, persuaded her to take it home, gave her $100 for her birthday and asked her to give him her used underwear.
In 2022, at a school athletics event, she went to drop off items to his office and he took a picture underneath her dress.
How he got caught
In May 2022, while in a lesson, the student's friend noticed she was messaging Ramiah and noticed the sexualised nature of the conversation, which referenced sex toys and masturbation.
The student's friend told her mum who in turn contacted the school and arranged a meeting with the then principal, Grant McMillan.
The student told McMillan nobody else in the school knew of the messages as Ramiah had told her to keep it a secret.
Ramiah was immediately placed on leave and subsequently dismissed by the Board of Trustees.
Ramiah got a 'thrill' out of the communications, felt 'so much power'
In February 2023, Ramiah participated in an interview with detective Jordan Suppers where he made a number of admissions, however maintained the offending only began in late 2021.
- He admitted the student first came to him in 2020 because she was being bullied. Ramiah told Suppers the student spoke to him about her depression, anxieties and her self-esteem issues;
- He said he was experiencing personal difficulties because of a return of his psoriasis and the medication for which caused him to struggle with erectile dysfunction;
- He said his relationship with his wife was at a low-point and he had suffered from isolation and stress because of Covid-19. He was also suicidal;
- Ramiah admitted he should have never let things for "this far": "I got into a, a rut with this and the thrill as a man, the thrill I was getting from this conversation, there's no physicality, it was verbal, and the thrill I was getting from having this discourse, this communication gave me this feeling of so much power and self-worth, self-esteem, it gave me, you know the belief that I was worth something in my life," Ramiah told Suppers;
- He said he "lost complete control because ... it was being reciprocated";
- Ramiah said the interactions were "the greatest thing in my life at that point";
- In regards to the touching, Ramiah accepted he had hugged the student once or twice and grabbed her bottom in the "spur of the moment";
- He told police he did not ask to touch her, denied touching her breasts or feeling her thighs and denied kissing her.
Other students and staff member
The former assistant principal also invited two other students into his office where he would discuss his sex life and affairs he had with former students.
He coerced both students to download Signal on their phones. One student deleted the app as soon as she got home and did not read the messages.
Ramiah offered to send the second student videos of him ejaculating - she declined.
The student felt uncomfortable with Ramiah's messages - where he would call her "sexy" and "beautiful" - and chose to ignore him.
However Ramiah would continue to contact her at school, including by kicking her on the bottom to get her attention.
The Teacher's Tribunal found Ramiah's conduct with the second and third students likely had an adverse impact on their wellbeing, as they attempted to avoid him while at school.
Later in May 2022, after Ramiah had been placed on leave regarding the contact with the first student, a colleague who was employed in a non-teaching role and 18 at the time, told the principal Ramiah commented on her body and described what he wished to do with her physically and sexually.
He had also sent sexual photos and encouraged her to do so, too.
"Ms X initially felt pressured and trapped into doing. Eventually she ceased to do so."
The staff member felt anxious about being at work, found it difficult to get out of bed in the morning and go to work.
Ramiah accepted full responsibility for his actions in relation to the first student, but did not respond in regards to the other two girls.
And while he accepted his behaviour towards the staff member, he maintained it was mutual.
James Cook High School's current principal Tina Filipo did not want to comment while Ramiah's case was still before the courts.
However, Filipo provided two statements to the school community about a "serious and upsetting matter" in March and then another statement this week.
She first was able to inform the community about Ramiah's charges in March as he had suppression up until he pleaded guilty.
Filipo said the school had asked for the school's name suppression to be lifted so they could communicate openly and transparently.
"Our priority is supporting any former/current students and families who have been affected by Mr Ramiah and his offending. We are committed to protecting the privacy of anyone impacted."
Ramiah will be sentenced at the Manukau District Court in August in regards to the first student.
- This story was first published by Stuff
Where to get help:
Sexual Violence
Victim Support 0800 842 846
Rape Crisis 0800 88 33 00
HELP Call 24/7 (Auckland): 09 623 1700, (Wellington): 04 801 6655 - push 0 at the menu
Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests (SNAP) 022 344 0496